So, I was on Google, and I did a search, typing in the URL for this blog. Well, it came up, "Stupid America" and then, the one snippet of text that followed was, "They're just asking for it". Hmm. That doesn't make me sound like a terrorist or anything... I mean, what the hell, Google? You couldn't find anything else to put in there? Do you want to put me on the no-fly list, is that it? What did I ever do to you, you massive cyber search engine? Did I cross the virtual line? Are you upset because if you were indeed not an internet search engine, but a flesh and blood human entity you would be shopping at 4am on Black Friday? Well, get over it.
I don't know, maybe I should change the name of the blog. Maybe I should call it "Stupid New York", since I am a native New Yorker and there is plenty of stupid going on here at any given moment. Or maybe I should just call it, "I am writing about whatever the hell I feel like writing about". But that would be cumbersome. And it would describe most blogs, wouldn't it? Except the baby picture blogs, which are just the modern version of random strangers whipping out their wallets to a captive audience and showing pictures of their little dear ones. And the Jesus blogs, which are mostly about Jesus, but maybe that IS what the bloggers feel like talking about, so really, it would fit the aforementioned descriptive title. Perhaps I should call this thing, "I Love my Stupid Country, which is America". Or, "My Country, tis of Thee and Me". Yeah, maybe. Or I could give it a name out of left field, like, "Zanzibara". Of course, that name would denote some sort of exotic content, the desert wind tickling your face as you enter in search of, what? Spices, a fertile oasis, a place to park your camel. What about "Fish Pickins". I don't know what that means, so it would definitely be out of left field. "Hello and welcome to Fish Pickins. Today I'm gonna rant about Cheerios and Lego. Also I will post pictures of my pet hamster and talk about the time I tap danced on stage with the Rockettes. This blog has nothing to do with either fish or picking them." At this point I should make it clear I have never tap danced with the Rockettes, either on stage or off, and I do not have a pet hamster. I could probably rant about Cheerios, though. Lego too.
I wonder if the name of this particular blog is the reason I got 10 hits from Saudi Arabia in a single day. I don't know, could be. The Saudis are supposed to be our allies, but that never stops anyone from enjoying a joke at someone else's expense. I have lots of friends who email me blonde jokes, after all ( because I am a blonde, naturally. And I do mean, naturally). They were probably disappointed when they didn't see the punchline to "How many Americans does it take to close their National Deficit?" I don't know the punchline to that one, so I can't post it. I apologize to our Saudi friends. If anyone knows the punchline, feel free to share. In the meantime, I'm going to leave you with this: Did you hear about the blonde who put lipstick on her forehead? She was trying to make up her mind.
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